You have NOT been served

Hi all,

Just a quick post to share a little anecdote which I thought, and Laura heartily agreed, was probably one of the best single examples of the service in South Africa so far. It's got everything: total unfamiliarity with the product being sold, dour and clueless waiting staff with only a vague grasp of English, a menu that has absolutely nothing to do with what the kitchen actually has in it, and frankly made-up responses to perfectly mundane and straightforward questions, all ending in me getting something I really didn't want at all.

I was so excited: I actually found a cafe with wireless internet! Hoorah! So I went one afternoon, dreaming of the perfect combination of caffeine, chocolate and online study space. The waitress eventually turned up and asked, in a distinctly disinterested tone, what I would like to order. Having not been offered a menu, I decided to hazard a guess that they had Earl Grey tea because it is quite common here and well, it's a cafe.

So I asked for a pot of Earl Grey tea and glass of tapwater. After a blank stare my waitress decided she had better get out a pen and paper to handle this one. Adjusting myself to her now-familiar skill-level, I decided to just start with the water. Okay, we had lift-off, she wrote down tap water. Now for the really confusing part, "Earl Grey tea."
"Ooo gway?"
"ER-LE GrAY. Tea."
"Tea."
"Yes, Earl Grey tea."
"Oh, I don't know."
"Okay, but you do have tea."
"Tea?"
"Yes, what kind of TEA do you have?"
"Cammomile, lemon, these kinds of things."
"What about black tea?"
"Black?"
"Yes, you know, Five Roses, Orange Pekoe..."
More blank staring. I finally gave up and asked for a menu. There, in plain print, were the words "Earl Grey Tea" which I could thankfully just point at to end this battle of wits. To her credit, she did subsequently manage to bring me a pot of tea AND tapwater. I was pleasantly surprised.

Menu now in hand and feeling deserving of some kind of chocolaty study-treat, I was enticed by the fudge brownie served with ice cream and chocolate sauce. Mmmmm... But I also made a mental note to ask about the "Variety of Cakes baked fresh daily" just in case they had something even better. Well, they didn't have any better cakes. Nor did they have any cakes. Nor did they have brownies, chocolate sauce for ice cream, or chocolate of any kind. My real choice, apparently, was between croissants and muffins. Disappointed, but really wanting something sweet, I asked what kind of muffins they had. I should have been suspicious when she did not actually go back to check. "Blueberry," she said, wihtout hesitation and in a voice of absolute authority. Momentarily, I was so taken-in by her sudden aura of competence that I even dared ask to have it heated.

Later, as I sat there dutifully swallowing my cold, cinnamon raisin muffin, I remembered the days when I would have sent it back and asked to speak to the manager. Thank you Africa, you have truly taught me patience.

:)Christina